Let me in
by LuvinLavi
Summary: For the first time in Tony's very short life he felt disgusted with himself. He had killed a Mu. He had done the very thing he condemned the humans for, he was no better. Its now up to Jomy to heal Tony's damaged psyche and save him from himself. Hope you enjoy!


**First time writing for this fandom, I hope you enjoy.**

**Warning: Tony x Jomy (not romantic)**

**Disclaimer: Towards the Terra does not belong to me. The end.**

He felt empty. For the first time in his life he heard no voices, no whispers no sounds being carried along the mental wavelengths. He was completely shut off from the rest of them. Tony knew he was different, he was stronger, grew faster and was quite frankly brighter than most of the individuals on the ship. Yet even though he was sure of all these things he still felt empty.

"I killed a Mu," he whispered to nothing but the still air. It was this single thought born from a rash action that haunted him at this point in time. It didn't help that he was also still mourning the loss of some of his own comrades. He felt as though he were drowning in all of his thoughts, completely losing himself. "Help!" he yelled to no one, it wasn't like anyone could hear anyways. The grief the anguish the storming emotions began to engulf him. He didn't want to go this way, the same way as his mother, but he had no strength to stop it. He no longer struggled and allowed the noise and darkness to swallow him: until it suddenly all stopped. No noise, no darkness, instead in their place stood Jomy, in all his Soldier glory. For some reason is felt as though he were glowing, like an angel in the stories his mother once told him.

"Grandpa," he whispered. His voice rough for some reason, clogged with tears and mucus. He wouldn't let them fall, not in front of Jomy, not in front of his soldier.

"I was worried, the ship had become too quiet. Your thoughts was no longer yelling at all of us." Jomy slowly made his way to the corner of the room Tony had barricaded himself in. Tony made no move to leave so he took a seat beside the younger Mu and looked forward. Through his peripheral view he could easily see the wetness in the youth's eyes, the anguish and all other emotions he was currently hiding behind a barrier. He could break it, yes, but that could possibly be the worst option so instead he stayed silent.

Tony was confused. Didn't his grandpa have more important things to do then look for him? They were in the middle of a war, he had responsibilities to attend to, lives to protect, people to discuss with. Why was he wasting his time with me? It was then that Tony heard the softest request ever ring through his thoughts.

"_Let me in_". This voice clearly belonged to that of his grandfather yet it carried with it a tone he had never heard from the man before. The voice rang with a worry, need and a gentle nudge like that of a father to a son. Tony slowly raised his head to look straight into the concerned eyes of his Soldier and guardian. But, no, he wouldn't allow Jomy into the chaos that was currently his psyche. It would be too easy to overwhelm him and drag him done under as well. It wasn't that he believed Jomy was weak, it was just that he loved him enough to protect him from himself. After all, Tony was different, a danger to those around him since he was a child.

It seemed as though Jomy could read the others turbulent thoughts by simply looking into his rose coloured eyes. Not long after the negative thoughts surfaced in Tony's mind did he hear another gentle plea, "_let me in… please_".

"Stop asking already!" Tony yelled in frustration gripping tightly to his thick curls. To others it would seem as though the shine had dulled and the colour of the tresses had faded. To Jomy it was clear that the younger Mu he was supposed to be watching over was falling apart.

"I'll speak to you in my actual voice then." Not a second later Tony found Jomy's face inches away from his own. His soft hands directly against his own wet cheeks. It seemed as though his Soldiers gloves had been abandoned not long ago. The feeling of skin against skin warmed and calmed Tony's frantic heart as well as the loving stare Jomy shared. A look filed with worry for someone he considered dear to his heart. It was a look Tony hadn't been witness to in a very long time. It was not surprising with the pressure being placed on his Soldier coming from both humans and Mu alike. For the first time in a long time, Jomy was just as vulnerable as Tony and it soothed him to no end. In a shaky yet collected voice, Jomy reiterated his previous demand, "_let me in_". It seemed to all fall apart with those simple words, and Tony allowed Jomy entrance into his subconscious.

The mental exchange of events, thoughts and feelings felt as though it had gone on for hours to Tony even though it had only been a few minutes. By the end of it however, Tony found himself in the arms of his grandfather. His face was buried into the mans chest directly above his beating heart. He could feel Jomy's unstable breathing, a clear indication of the tears currently flowing down his face. Tony allowed himself to be held close, and this is what he needed. He found his own tears, sobs, and screams joining that of his grandfathers. Release. That's what he felt, sweet release.

"It's all my fault!" he yelled uncontrollably. "I killed a Mu because I couldn't keep my emotions in check. I just stooped down to the level of those filthy humans! How am I ever going to look my comrades in the face again?" Tony quickly ripped his face from Jomy's chest, "how can I look you in the face!" Nothing could be heard apart from Tony's laboured breathing between the two.

Then it happened. Tony found his face thrust into the others chest for the second time that day, and his mind was bombarded by the same thought over and over and over again. "_It's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault, and __**it's not your fault!**__"_ Silence reigned. Both individuals took a synchronised deep breath in and out- then again, in and out. "You're all I have left Tony. Don't give up now. It's not your fault, I will be here to help you heal, so please, continue _to let me in_." Tony held onto his guardian tightly as if he were the only thing tethering him down to this ship- this reality.

"Please, don't leave me…" He weakly begged, feeling weaker than he had ever felt before.

Jomy tightened his hold around the young man, younger far beyond his looks and whispered in his ears, so that only he would hear these words, "I don't plan on leaving anytime soon."

**Hope you enjoyed my first fanfic for this story! I loved writing this, and I hope to write many more for this fandom, It his such an amazing underrated anime! Love you all and please don't be afraid to give me feedback, especially if it is constructive! Thank s so much.**

**Luv,**

**LuvinLavi **


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